Sometimes I have a way of expressing myself in ways not often heard, usually about the "Award Winning" knobs I work around. Here is a sampling of my terms used to describe them...
His crib had lead based paint.
He played w/ mercury a lot as a child.
His swimming pool was at the sewer treatment plant.
He's seen the inside of a short bus.
He dropped his chewing gum in the chicken yard and thought he found it 3 times.
If he was a coyote caught in a leg hold trap he'd chew off 3 legs and still be caught.
He's goofier than a shocked possum.
He's nuttier than a squirrel turd.
Did his mama work around a lot of radiation?
His parents must have dropped him a lot as a baby.
His mom must have taken part in LSD experiments.
Did his parents put model airplane glue in his milk bottle to calm him?
For Halloween he wanted to go as a turnip and forgot to take the plastic bag off his head afterwards.
I've seen better heads in a cabbage patch.
I bet rat poison agrees with him.
That boy must have drunk a lot of bad milk.
He shouldn't be in the breeding program.
The wheel is turning but the hamster is dead.
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